Darnell was one of the smartest guys in my high school. We were never in the same classroom because he was on the honors track. I was elsewhere. Last week, we caught up with each other on Zoom. I hate the technology. I always think I should come across better looking …
One of the greatest inventions of all time is the Slinky. Richard James must have been a fun guy. He invented my favorite toy back in the 1940s. This morning, after completing a few stretching exercises, I’m at the top of the stairs. Next to me, ready for competition, is …
I’ve started a number of corporations. One of my aspirational goals has been to receive funding from the government. If successful, it may have kept a few of my “great ideas” from going down the tubes. So far, I have been a flop. Smarter people than me have figured out …
Around the year of my birth, 1945, fire ants invaded the United States from Argentina. They showed up in Mobile, Alabama, ready for a fight and spread north from there. The ants made their way to Nevada several years ago. One hero stood in their path to keep them from taking …
All my friends over 70 are going nuts. They watch too much national news. CNN and FOX News appear to be their favorites, depending on their political bent. As the virus sweeps across our country, these sane senior citizens watch the same stuff, day after day, week …
I’m about to give you a gift. For about 50 years, when my mother, Irene, saw something she thought was fantabulous, she would shout, “Get your camera, Vern!” My poor dad would run to the house or car, get his Kodak and try to capture that special picture. When the blurry …
The dear Lord decided to test us all. The Lord said, “Stick all these couples together for several weeks. Don’t let them go out to eat. Close all the bars and furniture stores. Force them to use less toilet paper per flush. Make them play gin rummy or Monopoly together for …
Here’s a great tip that nobody likes. Sherry and I got rid of our dishwasher a decade ago. We do the dishes the old-fashioned way. Sometimes I wash. Sometimes I dry. Either way, I’m not up to Sherry’s rigorous standards. Between you and me, she is the one screwing up. …
When I first moved west, I was taken by the beautiful rocks all over the place. As a unique gift to my parents back in Pennsylvania, I found a smooth stone with streaks of gold and blue and green. I wrapped it up in a white, silk cloth, put it in a gold box and …
Just when things couldn’t get more frustrating this morning, Augie, my clumsy guardian angel, shows up. He’s weird enough looking already, but now he has on this freaky mask he claims was made in heaven. Usually, Augie is always patting me on the back – like a high school …