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Life of the dance party

December 20, 2018

If I had to do life all over again, I’d be an accomplished dancer. I wouldn’t specialize in just one type of dance, I’d be good at them all: ballet, tap, rock, modern, salsa, waltz and hip-hop. Then, at our recent holiday party, when this popular dance band encouraged guests …

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Frank’s trick

December 18, 2018

My best friend of all times was 30 years older than me. His name was Frank, and he was a mentor to me in so many ways long before the term “life coach” came into popularity. As a current old geezer at 73, I feel a tug of obligation to pass on a trick Frank …

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My personal heaven

December 16, 2018

When this aging stops, I’m so darn certain I’m headed to Heaven. Now I need to make a list of what is there waiting for me. It’s got to be good, or it wouldn’t be called Heaven, right? So this is my Heaven list: Caramel Dilly Bars must be available at all hours of the …

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Close call

December 13, 2018

I had Uber back in the 1960s. Rather than using a cell phone, I used my thumb and went across the states on many occasions with a wide range of drivers. Not that I recommend hitchhiking to young Americans, but I learned so much going from Chicago to Denver, from Champaign to …

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Handsome

December 11, 2018

When I was a boy, I thought I was particularly good looking. I blame my mother, who told me I was handsome over and over again. As I entered the real world, it became obvious that my looks, at best, might be considered unnoticeably average. I have old photos to prove how far …

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Tenderfoot

December 9, 2018

I didn’t get my first massage until I was over 60. I didn’t think the concept of a massage sounded very masculine or comfortable, and I was particularly self-conscious about my feet—my hammer toe, my ugly bunion and my ridiculously high arches. As a birthday gift, my wife …

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Prodigal son

December 6, 2018

As a young guy, I had an opportunity to run a full-service hotel on West Colfax in Denver. The Four Winds was owned by an 80-year-old Jewish businessman by the name of Jacob. He liked to hang out at the hotel and bother me. What a waste of time for me to babysit this ancient …

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What’s on your walls?

December 4, 2018

As I get older I’m finding what I put on my walls counts a whole bunch. After all, I go by the same walls 10 or 20 times in a day. I love to stare at pieces created by talented artists that speak to me. And I often speak back. I have a blue dog …

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The eternal frog

December 2, 2018

“You’re nuts,” my surgeon neighbor said to me. “Frogs don’t live for 15 years.” “Apples has, and he’s as healthy as ever,” I told him. Apples is a cute little green frog that hangs out on top of the cabinet in my garage. Over the years, Sherry and I have provided him a mason …

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Sherry’s too healthy

November 29, 2018

My wife, Sherry, is really starting to bug me about her physical fitness. She found this personal trainer named Johnny who has tattoos on both arms and I don’t know where else. He’s really fit and handsome. He also has a great sense of humor and is very smart. His whole …

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