When this aging stops, I’m so darn certain I’m headed to Heaven. Now I need to make a list of what is there waiting for me. It’s got to be good, or it wouldn’t be called Heaven, right? So this is my Heaven list: Caramel Dilly Bars must be available at all hours of the …
I had Uber back in the 1960s. Rather than using a cell phone, I used my thumb and went across the states on many occasions with a wide range of drivers. Not that I recommend hitchhiking to young Americans, but I learned so much going from Chicago to Denver, from Champaign to …
When I was a boy, I thought I was particularly good looking. I blame my mother, who told me I was handsome over and over again. As I entered the real world, it became obvious that my looks, at best, might be considered unnoticeably average. I have old photos to prove how far …
I didn’t get my first massage until I was over 60. I didn’t think the concept of a massage sounded very masculine or comfortable, and I was particularly self-conscious about my feet—my hammer toe, my ugly bunion and my ridiculously high arches. As a birthday gift, my wife …
As a young guy, I had an opportunity to run a full-service hotel on West Colfax in Denver. The Four Winds was owned by an 80-year-old Jewish businessman by the name of Jacob. He liked to hang out at the hotel and bother me. What a waste of time for me to babysit this ancient …
As I get older I’m finding what I put on my walls counts a whole bunch. After all, I go by the same walls 10 or 20 times in a day. I love to stare at pieces created by talented artists that speak to me. And I often speak back. I have a blue dog …
“You’re nuts,” my surgeon neighbor said to me. “Frogs don’t live for 15 years.” “Apples has, and he’s as healthy as ever,” I told him. Apples is a cute little green frog that hangs out on top of the cabinet in my garage. Over the years, Sherry and I have provided him a mason …
My wife, Sherry, is really starting to bug me about her physical fitness. She found this personal trainer named Johnny who has tattoos on both arms and I don’t know where else. He’s really fit and handsome. He also has a great sense of humor and is very smart. His whole …
I’ve never mastered the art of sleeping, even after reading a half dozen books authored by professionals claiming to be great sleep experts. How smug they must be hiding behind the authoritative lines of print in the paperback books that line my bedroom shelf. At three in …
At times my mind races on about stuff that just doesn’t matter, as if a floodgate of concern has opened up, like this morning when I couldn’t get my Southwest tickets to print out 24 hours in advance of my flight to Tampa and what if I get stuck in C group and all that …
