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How much to share?

April 1, 2024 by Don Kuhl

This is a sticky question. As I age, I may need to cut back.

Two of my good friends keep their personal lives close to the vest. I don’t pry, but their lack of sharing limits the level of our relationship.

Recently, a corporation asked me to consult with them and then kept key business matters under wraps. I could be of no tangible help and exited.

I’m just the opposite. I try to be an open book with my trusted friends. I’m sure I overstep the boundary from time to time, but I can’t help myself. For many years, I held on to too many secrets and lost healing support from those who cared. Today, thank goodness, I have many close friends who know me intimately and help me stay on course. 

As an owner of several corporations, I was the same kind of guy. Employees knew about as much as I did about what the heck was going on. As feasible, we kept no secrets from our customers. At times, I’d even share our companies’ weaknesses and screwups. They seemed to like our openness, and the corporations thrived.

It’s a tough question: How much to share? I think it gets down to one’s risk tolerance, comfort level and, for me, one other major factor.

In the words of my best adviser and wife, Sherry: “Don, you need to learn when to shut up.”

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