I was pretty ill for a week or so. I won’t bore you with the details, but I thought I was a goner for the first few days.
I’ve never had a fear of death. However, I would feel a tinge of sadness about missing out on friends, family and stuff happening tomorrow.
Since I was stuck on the floor for many hours, my mind went to three areas to clean up.
The first was practical. What do I want hanging around after I’m gone? Answer: not much.
For decades, I’ve kept a small, decorative trunk called Adam. I put the things that mean the most to me in Adam, mainly cards and letters from close friends and family. Also, a few treasures from my mom and dad that remind me how much I loved them. Special notes from Sherry. A large stack of my musings, some of them very personal, is buried at the bottom. I don’t want to confuse or overly amuse my family members, so much of Adam needs to be buried.
The second was pure joy. How lucky have I been? So many moments to treasure with Sherry and my son and daughter. Nineteen dogs and nine cats fell madly in love with me. The number of good friends I have is in the triple digits. I made a good living doing work I loved that touched over 30 million people. I became kind of wealthy and gave most of it away to worthy causes and individuals.
Finally, my mind went to humility and understanding my place in the world. I think it takes a lifetime to really appreciate how your life fits into the scene of things. It brought me to a spiritual peace. I am a little tiny piece in a huge jigsaw puzzle. Yet, without my contributions, the puzzle remains unfinished. After bouncing back and forth over most of my life, I became certain of a higher power I call God. God picked out which puzzle piece was me.
God said it wasn’t my time, so you are stuck with reading more blogs.
Big decisions in July